I am just a normal person. I am not an expert, nor will I ever claim to be. I am just a 20-something that has chosen a different and more direct path with relationships. Let's be open and honest, while discovering our paths.

Whether you are going to fall in love in high school and get married soon after or you have had a late start "blooming", everyone wants to be loved and appreciated. How is one to ultimately decide what is right for them? There are so many options and roads you can take when choosing to love and be loved. Are you going to be on the straight and narrow or are you going to take an alternative road? There is no right way to love..

Except, we were trained and programed by a society of people, who were taught a lot of the same philosophies and "rules" to dating. When growing up if you were given a piece of paper telling you what you should do in life and that is was going to be "right for you", would you have taken that path? Probably not. The good thing about individuality is everyone is different, we all need and want different things. Why should our love lives be any different?

People are so quick to judge things that are a bit different, myself included. No one is perfect, so why the contest? Who is to say what is right for me, is for you? Love comes in so many different shapes and sizes, no one has the same fit. Why is it acceptable to shame someone for being happy? Who is to say that if they are promiscuous or not loving in "the normal" way that they are damaged or hurt, so they are seeking something strange and new to fill a void?

No one should ever be made to feel bad about their choices in the matters of relationships. Love is one of the most natural things. Whether you would like to believe it or not, you can have a relationship with anyone. Basic friendship is a relationship. You have chosen this person to be in your life, you love them, you care for them, you don't want to see them hurt, you want only the best for them. Romance isn't the only or even most important part of a relationship.

If you sat down and really thought about it. You would realize that romance is a small factor in a relationship. You can not have romance without trust or chemistry. Both things that are necessary for an great friendship as well. I personally take great pride in my friendships. Especially now that I am getting older. I have a few friends that I love with my whole heart and it leaves me to think and wonder...

If we are able to have many friends and love them with a deep trusting love, why are we limited to love only one person romantically? Who made these boundaries and why are they applied to everyone? Shouldn't it be our choice on how we choose to give and receive love?

A friend emailed me a quote about love the other day. It said,

“Love [is] the will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth.”

– M. Scott Peck 

For as  much as I like this quote, I think it is inaccurate. I think we love to gain and give, yes. But, I don't feel like it should be limited between two people. I think there are many ways to love and how we choose to do it is our own decision and it is up to us to find out "right way to love."

Feel free to email, comment or message me about anything you have to say. I would love to speak with anyone further about this. More posts to follow.

Happy Dating.